there are, indeed, still party rules
Sep. 6th, 2014 07:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
chhotiiThere we were at Scott and Rachel's party. Sophia was in the pool, so of course, I was sitting in the pool area. Not staring at her the whole time; there were a lot of other eyeballs on the scene. I was listening to one of these endless fascinating but pointless debates on the effectiveness of the TSA in preventing terrorism.
Then I noticed a commotion in the pool. Sophia and a boy were fighting in the pool. Not play-fighting; serious grabbing each other's heads trying to drown each other fighting. I jumped up and yelled at Sophia to stop and get out of the pool. She was inclined to stay in the pool and stand her ground, since it appeared that the boy was going to get to stay in the pool-- which would be victory to him, which she thought was unfair. They continued to fight, so I yelled at both the kids to get out of the pool. The boy scampered off. At no point did I see any parent or other responsible adult interact with the boy. Sophia bawled that she was getting all the blame and punishment for the situation, yet again, so not fair. Then we left.
Yes, I admit, the conflict probably arose in the first place because my kid was being unreasonable. However, I could've used the other parent's help in yelling at the kids to get out of the pool, and another judge on the parental panel of judges. And what if I hadn't been on the scene either?
I went home wondering aren't parents supposed to watch their kids in the pool? Or is it just assumed that there's enough density of adults to take care of things as needed? I had wondered this earlier when I felt stuck at the poolside, watching Sophia in the pool, and the smell of meat started to waft over from the grill, and felt frustrated that I don't have a co-parent to either take over or go fetch me a hamburger. I tried to get someone else to fetch me a burger... and was told "go get it yourself, there's plenty of parents here." (Note, this was a non-parent who said this to me.) [Fortunately, the few minutes that I was out of the pool area getting burger and drink were apparently uneventful.]
So, when I got home, I dug up the party rules that Scott and Rachel posted. Here I quote the relevant rules:
See, I do have a right to be miffed at the boy's parent(s). As far as I can tell, they were breaking all of these rules; there were unfortunate consequences; and they are probably oblivious to the fact that there were any consequences. (I have no idea who this boy was, or who his parents are.)
Perhaps it's not such a good idea for me to go to these parties with Sophia and no other adult. I am often alone in the crowd at such parties. By myself, without Sophia, I can be fine alone in the crowd, drinking sangria and appreciating the fire-spinning. When I have Sophia, though, I could use the support of another grown-up.
Then I noticed a commotion in the pool. Sophia and a boy were fighting in the pool. Not play-fighting; serious grabbing each other's heads trying to drown each other fighting. I jumped up and yelled at Sophia to stop and get out of the pool. She was inclined to stay in the pool and stand her ground, since it appeared that the boy was going to get to stay in the pool-- which would be victory to him, which she thought was unfair. They continued to fight, so I yelled at both the kids to get out of the pool. The boy scampered off. At no point did I see any parent or other responsible adult interact with the boy. Sophia bawled that she was getting all the blame and punishment for the situation, yet again, so not fair. Then we left.
Yes, I admit, the conflict probably arose in the first place because my kid was being unreasonable. However, I could've used the other parent's help in yelling at the kids to get out of the pool, and another judge on the parental panel of judges. And what if I hadn't been on the scene either?
I went home wondering aren't parents supposed to watch their kids in the pool? Or is it just assumed that there's enough density of adults to take care of things as needed? I had wondered this earlier when I felt stuck at the poolside, watching Sophia in the pool, and the smell of meat started to waft over from the grill, and felt frustrated that I don't have a co-parent to either take over or go fetch me a hamburger. I tried to get someone else to fetch me a burger... and was told "go get it yourself, there's plenty of parents here." (Note, this was a non-parent who said this to me.) [Fortunately, the few minutes that I was out of the pool area getting burger and drink were apparently uneventful.]
So, when I got home, I dug up the party rules that Scott and Rachel posted. Here I quote the relevant rules:
Swimming Pool and the Pool Area
Children under the age of 13 in the pool area (this means anywhere inside the pool gate, not just in the water) must be watched by a parent (or specified adult, with their consent) at all times.
If that adult is not in the pool area, the child must not be either. This may occasionally feel difficult, but it’s a fundamental rule of pool safety.
...
Children
For the comfort and enjoyment of all attending, we ask for thoughtful and appropriate control to be exerted over the behavior of children. Please be aware of what your kids are doing, and how it may be affecting other people at the party. If this is likely to be difficult, consider leaving them at home with a babysitter.
See, I do have a right to be miffed at the boy's parent(s). As far as I can tell, they were breaking all of these rules; there were unfortunate consequences; and they are probably oblivious to the fact that there were any consequences. (I have no idea who this boy was, or who his parents are.)
Perhaps it's not such a good idea for me to go to these parties with Sophia and no other adult. I am often alone in the crowd at such parties. By myself, without Sophia, I can be fine alone in the crowd, drinking sangria and appreciating the fire-spinning. When I have Sophia, though, I could use the support of another grown-up.
